Moments Like These

Ever since starting my internship, I've had more than my fair share of...shall we say, dear-God-please-kill-me-now moments. Honestly, I don't even know where to begin...

OK, we'll start with the "meetings" (aka teleconferences). As you know, the way these so-called meetings work, is at the scheduled time, you dial into something called Meeting Place (it's a regular phone number). And then, to attend a meeting, you press 1 on your phone. And then you enter the Meeting ID, a 7 digit number that only people who are going to attend the meeting will know (everyone has their own Meeting ID, so whoever schedules the meeting usually just use their Meeting ID. So it's not a number that no one except the meeting attenders know, but no one would dial someone else's Meeting ID if there's no meeting scheduled anyway--everyone's already got enough on their plates.) So after that (yes it's kind of tedious), you "at the tone, say your name or location then press #". Finally after that, you're officially in the meeting.

So usually, during the meeting, when someone's talking, everyone else listens (well obviously). If there's a lot of background noise around you, or if someone wants to talk to you face to face, it's generally wise to press "#5" or a button if you're using a headset and put yourself on mute so that no one else on the line can hear you. And then after you're done, you want to unmute yourself in case someone on the line asks you something (so you'd be able to answer). As you can probably guess, the muting and unmuting can get a littleeeeeee crazy, or confusing.

That said, once during a meeting, a project manager was supposed to speak, but he wasn't on the line, so we moved on to someone else. Then later, the manager assigned someone else to speak for the project manager since he still hasn't dialed in. As this person (the substitute) was talking, I see the project manager walk in. And wanting to notify him that everyone's talking about his project, I blurted out, loudly, "Tony! They're talking about your project!"

Then, I looked over to my phone...andddddddddd...the mute button hasn't been pressed...

...

CRAP! Everyone just heard what I said. Dear God, please kill me now.
I could not get over this for the entire day. It might not seem like a big deal, but to me, at the time, it was. I was so incredibly embarrassed.

Besides this, here are a couple of things to keep in mind next time you're in a conference call:

1. Do not answer someone's question while you're on mute
2. Do not dial in in your house, so that everyone can hear your dog barking or children yelling in the background
3. Do not drive and honk while attending these meetings
   
4. Do not, PLEASE do not go to the bathroom while you're on the line and are not on mute... (thankfully, I wasn't there when this happened. I was told you can hear everything....)

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Moving on...I think I'm the biggest idiot when it comes to business etiquette. So, when I met my hiring manager's boss (yes, he's pretty high up, three more levels, and you're at the CEO) for the first time, I failed to stand up. Yes, you heard me, I FAILED TO STAND UP TO SHAKE HIS HAND WHEN I MET HIM, MY BOSS'S BOSS FOR THE FIRST TIME. I SHOOK HIS HAND WHILE SITTING DOWN.

Dear God, please kill me now.

I think I was just so taken aback by the fact that he would come especially to introduce himself to me and talk to me (to me, an intern), that I just forgot to.

Subsequently, I think I've stood up every single time I met someone...even other interns. But no matter how much standing up I do now, it will probably not wipe the lasting impression in my boss's boss's head that "jee, that intern H really has no manners".

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Lastly, I really think I have a memory problem. Today, when my group (12 people, including my boss, and my boss's boss) all went out to dinner, something incredibly ridiculous happened. So me being the happy giddy girly girl that I was, asked people (around 2 or 3 at a time) if they mind if I take their picture. Of course, being the polite folks that they are, no one objected. So I was going around the table, taking everyone's pictures.

And of course, when I get to my boss's boss, this had to happen. So his (my boss's boss) name is Pete. And the person to the right of him is Tony. And the person to the right of Tony is Mike. So I wanted to get all of three of them in the picture. So I called Tony first. (This got Tony and the attention of everyone around him). So basically, after I had the attention of EVERYONE...for the life of me, I COULD NOT remember what my boss's boss's name was...I BLANKED OUT. I just stared at Tony and my boss's boss...and...it LITERALLY took me at least 30 seconds to finally say "Pete!", (Dear God please kill me now!!!) after which a co-worker commented "you forgot his name? you forgot HIS name?" after which everyone bursted out laughing. And then, to make it worse, I forgot Mike's name as well...but managed to recover a little faster this time.

Crap! Why do things like these always happen to me?! I swear, this was not the first time this exact type of thing (forgetting the name of someone who I should know) happened to me...

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OK, having said all that, I do have to say I really love my job and especially the people that I work with. I've really been learning so much and having so much fun. I think my company has a great culture where there's a lot of visibility. Everyone's doing something that'll contribute to make it a better company, at least in my group--BI (Business Intelligence). And I think that's a very big motivator--knowing that you can make a difference in a big aspect of your company.

We're in the middle of our week-long staff (i.e. everyone, even those from India and Colorado) meeting (everyday from 8-5)and I've just been absorbing so much information and really liking what I'm hearing--like how we plan to improve ourselves, our team, etc.

Today, the CFO came to see us and spent an hour talking to us and answering our questions. Now it's not everyday that you can get the CFO to come and talk to a group of 12 people for an hour ANSWERING our questions. I even asked him a couple of questions. It was amazing. What a rare opportunity.

There's also a running gag on the team to sing happy birthday to one of the members every time we take him out to dinner. Someone would notify the restaurant who's "birthday" it is. And then later they would bring out candles and we'd all sing him happy birthday even though it (obviously) is not his birthday. It's hilarious! He would be taken by surprise every single time and everyone would crack up and laugh about it for like... 10 minutes. This has gone on for 5 years already...It's just great...and really doesn't get any more awesome than this!

The Art of BullS***ting

You know how when you were in middle school and high school in your English classes, there were always those people who NEVER read the books but who ALWAYS knew what they were talking about when the teacher called on them? Well....I wasn't and still am not one of those people. I just don't understand how they do it. I mean, yes, they're basically talking about nothing, but they make you think that they're actually talking about something. And you're convinced that indeed, they are saying something useful. How? How do they do it?

Basically, whenever one of these people open their mouths and start talking, you pretty much get drawn in so much that you forget that, wait, you knew that too. But for some reason, if you had just try to say what they said, it would sound like utter gibberish and the teacher would most definitely be like, "H, what are you talking about? Have you even read this book?" Gah!

For me, I always have to read the book like...10 times, think about what it is I want to say, actually say it in my head, and then, if I get called on, produce something that's boundaryline coherent if I'm lucky. I think it has to do with the fact that I, for some goddamned reason, always start thinking about something else midsentence. I'd be like, "So the reason why Holden hates Sally is because Sally's --[thought comes in]--Oh, nevermind." Well, I can't think of a concrete example, but you get the point. I'd start saying something, and then, right when I'm about to make my point, I think about something else that's related to the topic that makes me doubt the point I'm about to make, then I hesistate and end up not making any sense. It always happens!

Another thing that I do whenever I have something to say, is build up people's anticipation DESPITE the fact that I actually want to downplay it. It's like, I try my best not to build up their anticipation, but doing that actually helps the anticipation. Ok, so here's what happens. I always prepare my audience by saying that what I'm about to say isn't that important, blah blah blah. But I end up spending so much time explaining why it's not important, that the people get impatient and want to hear about the actual thing more and more. This might not make any sense to you and...I'm sorry, but I can't think of an example to illustrate what I'm talking about.

Back to people who BS, I don't know if these BSers actually go behind everyone and read up and just tell everyone they don't so as to make everyone believe that they're BSing everything they say (which produces the opposite effect on people--i.e. people are actually impressed by what they say) or they really do have a talent for pulling things out of their ass (which, heck, is even more impressive)!

Under My Umbrella Ella Ella Eh Eh Eh ...

So despite the fact that I'll probably be screwed for my 5am meeting (aka teleconference), I'm still going to write this post. Why? Because I want to, because I feel like it. (Yes, I'm very impulsive, in case you haven't noticed)

I've recently developed a liking for hip hop songs, well, maybe a little more than liking...more like...I LOOVE hip hop songs. I've always been someone who can't live without music...music makes me happy and giddy. But hip hop, now that's a whole different story. I don't know if it's what happened to me at the end of last semester, but ever since May, I've been obsessed with hip hop. I think it's the beat. And also, now that I have a subwoofer, the bass sounds in songs are much more amplified, making the beats stand out much more. Another influence is So You Think You Can Dance. If you haven't watched it, you are missing out majorly. I'm so addicted to that show. I think I watched most episodes from last season at least 3 times. The dancing on there is just amazing, especially the hip hop ones. I think it also has to do with the fact that it makes me think of parties, which are incredibly fun (well, some).

So every time I put a hip hop song on, it just makes me want to get up and start dancing. :) I burnt 2 CDs of songs that are mostly hip hop and I listen to them every single day on my way to work and on the way back (bascially, any time I'm in my car) and I just LOVE IT! I love blasting my music in my car (which btw, has an excellent stereo system).

My Playlist:
1. Glamorous - Fergie
2. 1, 2 Step - Ciara (I know this song isn't new, but I never caught onto it until now)
3. Don't Matter - Akon
4. Beautiful Girls - Sean Kingston
5. Sexy Love - Ne-Yo
6. Fergalicious - Fergie
7. Give it to Me - Timbaland
8. SexyBack - Justin Timberlake
9. She's Like the Wind - Lumidee
10. Summer Love - Justin Timberlake
11. What Goes Around Comes Around - Justin Timberlake (hot movie-style video with Scarlett Johansson)
12. Umbrella - Rihanna (the title comes from this song)
13. The Way I Are - Timbaland
14. Whine Up - Kat DeLuna Feat. Elephant Man
15. Smack That - Akon
16. Because of You - Ne-Yo
17. All Good Things (Come to an End) - Nelly Furtado
18. Say it Right - Nelly Furtado
19. Promiscuous - Nelly Furtado
20. So Sick - Ne-Yo
21. Let Me Love You - Mario

I also like a bunch of songs by 50 Cent, Chingy, Nelly, and Snoop Dog that I'm not particularly proud of (well actually some of the songs on the playlist too). If you know me, you probably know I have strong views on the double standard. You know, the whole topic on how it's acceptable for guys to be players, but if girls do the same, then they're sluts. It's not just that, there's more to it than that, but I don't want to get into that right now. (If you're curious, then ask me next time I see you.) That said, you might say I'm being a little contradictory since the majority of songs by the artists I just mentioned are very derogatory to women. But I justify it by saying that 1) I like the songs for their beats and the melody, NOT the lyrics 2) these songs have been played at parties a lot, and it's kind of like, I'm conditioned to like them--you can't really help it, living in today's society (which brings me back to the whole unfairness...).

OK, I actually intended on writing about something else...but it turned out to be this. *shrugs* Funny how things turn out... I guess I'll save my original topic for next time.

Alright, there you have it folks, your daily (well almost daily) dose of H.

Good Ol' Target & Snail Cars

I'm going to talk about two topics today. And I don't like to talk about more than one topic at a time because I feel like whenever I talk about more than one topic, people will be less likely to leave comments...because I feel like I've diverted their attention or something. It's like, Oh I have something to say about this, let me leave her a comment, oh wait, she's talking about something else now, nevermind. Grr! That's so annoying! Don't do that! If you want to leave a comment, leave it! :)

Alas, I don't have a choice since I think it'd be too short of a post to just talk about one of the things I want to talk about today.

Recently, I spent $67 on clothes at Target. That's right, clothes! At Target! C-L-O-T-H-E-S! Believe me, I had the same thought as you--I never thought I'd end up buying any CLOTHES from Target, let alone almost $70 of clothes. I've always thought that the clothes at Target don't fit well. Never did it even occur to me to try on clothes when I'm at Target usually. But since I haven't been to the mall for awhile (yes it was hard trying to prevent myself from going and thereby probably splurging an obscene amount of unnecessary money), I decided to grab a bunch of clothes and try them on for the heck of it since I was already at Target. I totally did not expect any to fit. But to my surprise, I was actually able to find some excellent quality, well fitting, inexpensive clothes today. :) Altogether, I got 6 pieces of clothing, which, if you think about it, is very, very worth it considering their quality is no less good than, say, the quality of the clothes at Victoria's Secret or American Eagle. And that is no exaggeration. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying all clothes from Target fit well. Some do, some don't. You just have to know where to look. ;-)

Besides this, I've noticed a very odd phenomenon here at California. Whenever I'm driving somewhere, I always end up behind slow moving vehicles thinking that I'm stuck in traffic, that there is a whole line of cars in front of the car in front of me. But no, that's not the case. It turns out that there are NO cars in front of these cars. (I was able to see when the road curves.) So these cars are JUST MOVING AT A SLOW SPEED ON FREEWAYS FOR NO REASON. I know in Cali, people are very relaxed and laid back, but come on, just HOW relaxed can you get?! Jeez! These people always drive me crazy!!! And I of course, being the impatient person that I am, always tail them, and then speed past them if I can, cursing at them in the meantime. OK, I didn't curse at them....but you get the point.

The Moment

Every single time the MOMENT I decide to go into the bathroom to take a shower, someone ALWAYS beats me to it! I swear, it always happens! I'd sit around at my desk, waiting and waiting for people to use the bathroom before I decide to go. I'd be thinking: Ok, come on people, if you want to use it now, use it, because I'm not going to use it right now. And the bathroom would be empty this whole time of course....until THE MOMENT I decide that I've waited long enough and if there wasn't anyone in there for this long, there isn't going to be from the time I stand up til the time I get there. But NOPE, someone always manages to get in there THE MOMENT I stand up and start walking.

It's not location-specific either, it doesn't matter where I am or who I live with. THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS! It's as if people can sense it...it's like...people just know when I want to take a shower and be like "uh uh, ain't gonna let H take her shower"!!!

Grrrrrr!!! This is like...the 4th place it's happened to me at (and god knows how many times)!

Relaxing Silence

I just finished meeting (aka teleconferencing) with my project team. It started at 5am and ended at 6:30am. I would sleep in and go to work a bit later today, but I have another meeting to attend to at 8:00am.

So in the meeting that just ended, we talked about getting down the requirements and scope of the project. I never realized just how "global" my company is until everyone said where they're calling in from. There's one person from Spain, one from Singapore, three from the US (Delaware, Colorado, and California), and two from the UK. No wonder I had to get up at 5...with so many different time zones, someone is bound to end up with a not-so-ideal-time.

And strangely enough, I don't feel that tired. Though, I have a feeling that I probably will need a lot of coffee today. EDIT (at 10:21am): Speaking of which, I've pretty much become a slave to coffee, not by choice. It's just that, getting up at 7:30am almost everyday and not getting home until 5pm or later can be quite tiring (especially right after lunch..I always have to try so hard to prevent myself from sleeping away). So, I have no choice but to drink the oh-so-very-unpleasant energy elixir which makes me jittery as hell afterwards. I just downed a mug of coffee about 30 minutes ago. And now my heart's pounding, I feel anxious, I don't know what to do with myself. It's like I'm tired, but some force is making me stay awake...Like, you want to fall asleep, but someone's pulled your eyes open, permanently--very unpleasant. In short, I HATE THIS FEELING!!! But without it, I'd probably be too tired to pay much attention during meetings. *sigh* such is the sad world of the corporate work place...

Ok a thought just popped into my head. And now I'm wondering why we don't make any sounds when we yawn. I mean, when we sneeze, there's a sound, so how come when we yawn, there isn't any? This silence is quite interesting... I think it's kind of nice. Yea...it'd definitely be very annoying if every time someone yawned, there's a sound. I think we all yawn more than we sneeze everyday. Furthermore, if yawns were to have a sound, what would they sound like? They wouldn't be crisp, short sounding, like a sneeze because they're long and drawn out and make you feel relaxed afterwards. So what's a sound that describes that?

Any ideas?

Luring Fascination

In the spirit of talking about animals that live in the sea, I'm going to talk about the angler fish, a fish that I've always been fascinated by.

What amazes me the most is its lure--the "light" above its head which allows it to attract prey. Just think, a fish with a light on its head. That's pretty cool. Imagine if all humans had some sort of light on their heads that would light up whenever we want it to. Ok it doesn't sound as cool because we're not used to the concept. But if everyone were born with it, I'm sure it'd be a useful tool. :)

Anyway, I can just picture a bottom-dwelling fish, who's lived in darkness all its life suddenly see a glimmer in the distance. This, I can only assume, will mesmerize it so much that it feels compelled to swim towards it. And that, my friends, would be the end of the existence of this fish...

Furthermore, I just found out recently, that the males exist SOLELY for reproductive reasons. Now that's just sad. Here's what happens: The males are basically parasites, much smaller than the female and once they sense that there's a female near, they'll attach themselves to them (if they don't find a female within a certain time after they're born, then they die since they don't have a digestive system). Then they'll atrophy into a pair of gonads, and the gonads will release the sperm once they sense that the female is about to release her eggs. Talk about having a life!

Now just imagine the human analogy: Girls are much bigger/taller than boys. When boys are born, they bite the flesh on girls and attach themselves there so they can survive. Then, slowly, they'll shrink into nothing but a pair of testicles. And when girls are all grown up and are ready to have a baby, she'll automatically be pregnant (since the testicles can sense when she wants to get pregnant). That would just be a sad sad world...not to mention a bit messed up...

Mola Mola

In asking people for cool places to visit this summer, I was suggested the world famous Monterey Bay Aquarium. Wanting to learn more about it, I decided to look it up on Wikipedia. The Monterey Bay Aquarium "is one of the largest and most respected aquariums in the world. It has an annual attendance of 1.8 million and holds 35,000 plants and animals representing 623 species..." Wow. Impressive...I thought, so I continued to read. "...features the world's largest single paned window (crafted by a Japanese company, the window is actually 4 panes seamlessly glued together through a proprietary process)...The Aquarium appeared in the 1986 film Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home..."

And then...I saw this:

WTF!??! Is that...a fish? Holy crap, and I thought goldfish are disgusting... This thing looks like a giant scab, floating in the water. And trust me, nothing can be more disgusting than a scab floating in water. I literally had to prevent myself from puking after seeing this.

It's called the Ocean Sunfish (or Mola Mola), the heaviest bony fish (or taxonomic superclass Osteichthyes, what most fish are part of) in the world. It can weigh up to 5,100 lbs. More than 40 different species of parasites live on its skin, causing it discomfort. And because of this, it basks in the sun so that birds can pick at its skin. Oh apparently, "despite its size, the docile ocean sunfish poses no threat to human divers." Great! I think I'll just go and pet it now!

NOT!

More monstrous Mola Mola: